Thursday, June 20, 2013

10 Worst Compliments I've Ever Heard

Aren't our glasses the bomb?!

We've all been there... the sting from a backhanded compliment. I like to refer to them as "comli-sults"... Compliment/insults. Sometimes they are said with the best of intentions, but get lost in translation, and sometimes they are said with pure malice. Here are some of the worst best compliments that I've received in my lifetime. And yes, each of these were actually said to me...

1. "I love how you look with short hair. It makes your face seem less long." I kid you not... someone has told me this before. To be fair, it was a guy telling me this, and he was clearly lacking in certain verbal graces, but still. He's kind of the reason I wore my hair short for almost 5 years... I developed a complex. Man... I gotta develop thicker skin. 

2. "OMG you look just like Avril Lavigne!!" I don't even know what to say about this one. I've been told this twice in my life. Personally, I don't see it...

3. "You look really hot from far away." And what? I don't up close?? This was particularly devastating because the guy saying this to me was super cute...

4. "You're so pretty! Are you European?" What are you saying? That American's can't be attractive?

5."You look so tired today." This phrase should forever be wiped from the minds of all humankind. Never say this to someone else.

6. "You have beautiful hair. Is it real??" I could write an entire blog post on how offensive this "compliment" really is. WHY would you EVER ask someone this?

7. "Your makeup looks so great today."

8. "You really grew into your nose." Well I'm glad you think so! ... sheesh.

9. "I'm glad you work here now. You are definitely the decorative aspect of this institution." Wha...?

10. "You smell good... like bacon." Uh, thanks?

So let's here your compli-sults!

9 comments:

  1. A tan friend told me that at least I like being that color (when referring to my vampirish legs). Love her. And you do have fab hair, just sayin'.

    Marie @
    Lemondrop ViNtAge

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  2. Haha that's another perfect example of a compli-sult! You're not sure if they're trying to tell you that if you did make it, then you're talented, or if they're just plain being mean.

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  3. These are AWESOME. Someone once said, "I like your skirt, did you make it yourself?" Um...no...

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  4. How did you guess!? Haha. They sure know how to pay compliments to the ladiez... ;-)

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  5. She's definitely a beautiful woman, I just didn't personally think I looked like her. Although to be fair, I went through a period in my life where I dressed just like her and wore my hair very similar to hers.

    Aw the woman at Walmart took a picture of you?? That's both awkward and cute at the same time. She must really miss her granddaughter :(

    Your dad's compliment reminds me of my dad! Sometimes he says stuff that is completely well-intentioned, but comes out all wrong!

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  6. I had absolutely no idea that someone made a bacon fragrance! I'm not sure how that would mingle pleasantly with someone's natural fragrance. I kind of want to request a sample... haha.

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  7. Haha! "You smell good... like bacon" - I'm guessing it was a guy who told you this?

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  8. I think Avril Lavigne's hot, so I'd take that as a compliment! I rarely spend time around strangers, and when I do, I am often lost in my own little world so... yeah. However, I do have a few compli-sults:

    I have dentures, and they're rather ill fitting because when I was 17 my family ordered a kit and did them in the comfort of our own home... I kid you not. Anyway, during one seasonal job, some little kid (of course) were like "your teeth are weird, are they real?!" Ugh...

    Also based on teeth, while I was on the phone with my father for Father's Day, I told him I finally visited a dentist... word for word: "That's great, honey. You have a long life ahead of you, I'm glad you won't be in pain. Plus you'll look and feel better. You may not be a beautiful person, but if you feel good, that is what counts." Um, THANK YOU FATHER. I FEEL WONDERFUL NOW. I know he didn't mean this rudely, he just... he's horrible with compliments.

    While walking into our local smoke shop, I had a girl in the parking lot scream "shake that ass!" ...what the fu...?

    Finally, not exactly a compliment or insult, but still weird... our local Wal-Mart door greeter has said I look like her granddaughter every time she see's me and she once stopped me in front of everyone TO TAKE A PICTURE OF ME. Awkward.

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  9. haha oh, i just don't understand how people could say these things without feeling weird about it themselves! and i guess smelling like bacon is a good thing, did you know they even made a fragrance for it? -> http://www.fargginay.com/ (i'm not advertising for this website, i just can't believe it exists :D)

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